How to Create Change That Lasts
At this time each year, most New Year’s resolutions have met their demise. Research suggests that by February, 80% of people will have already failed to keep the goals they set for themselves at the beginning of the year. We tend to start the year with vigor, thinking this is the year that I’ll finally do that thing… and then old habits creep back in offering us relief and comfort.
Change is hard. Katy Milkman knows. Katy, an award-winning behavioral scientist and author of How to Change - The Science of Getting from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be, has done a lot of research around the internal obstacles that stand in the way of us making the changes we actually want, and yes, the biggest obstacle is usually ourselves. Katy recognizes that while 80% of goals set fail, when this statistic is flipped around 20% of goals set do succeed, - “that’s a lot of people who’ve changed their lives for the better simply because they resolved to try in the first place”.
Our own resolve to try is the first step, but too often it's our own fears, judgments, motivations and habitual patterns that get in the way of us making the changes we desire. Our brains are wired to resist change, and while persistence can pay off eventually, in isolation, most change efforts will fail. To have a higher chance of success, we need to build a strategy to support ourselves.
BJ Fogg, Founder of Stanford’s Behavior Design Lab and author of Tiny Habits, The Small Changes That Change Everything, says that for any behavior change to be successful, motivation, ability and prompt have to come together at the same time. We must have the motivation to do the behavior, the ability to do the behavior and a prompt to remind us to take action. Applying the Fogg Behavior Model, if our motivation is high and it’s easy to do, we’re more likely to make the change when prompted. If our motivation is low and it’s hard to do, we’re not likely to do it. If our motivation is high but it’s hard to do, the high motivation can pull us to make the change despite the difficulty.
Assuming we have the motivation, ability and prompt, what strategies can we employ to make the change we desire stick?
Choose just one behavior to change.
Research has found that change efforts are more likely to be successful if we focus on just one thing. In his blog James Clear writes “the best way to change your entire life is by not changing your entire life. Instead, it is best to focus on one specific habit, work on it until you master it, and make it an automatic part of your daily life. Then, repeat the process for the next habit.
If you’re not sure what change to make or how to prioritize, consider each dimension on the wheel of life: health, friends and family, significant other, career, personal growth, fun and leisure, home environment, finances. As you consider each dimension, which area feels most out of balance? If you made a change in just one of these dimensions, which one would create more harmony in your life?
Alternatively, check out this annual review from Farnam Street Blog. There are some excellent prompts in here that will have you reflecting on where you might want to make changes in your life.
Create a vision.
Change is successful when you know where you’re going and you can visualize the outcome. Once you have identified where you’d like to create change, consider what the current situation is versus what you would like the future state to be. When we have a clear vision, the action steps we need to take to achieve our goals become easier to articulate. Ask yourself “what would it look like if you implemented the change and it was successful?”
Break it down.
Change efforts have a higher probability of success if we take small steps. BJ Fogg believes simple is powerful and encourages us to start tiny. He acknowledges “difficult behaviors require a high level of motivation” and we can easily abort our goals if they seem too challenging. If we start with a tiny habit that’s easier to do, we can create momentum and build an automatic habit. Once formed, we can then build on it with another tiny habit. These tiny habits compounded will move us towards our ultimate goal.
Make it fun.
If change is boring or tedious, guess what? We’re not going to be motivated to actually do it. If we can make it fun it can start to be something we look forward to. How to make it fun?
Tag the new behavior to something you already look forward to. Temptation bundling is a strategy where you pair a pleasurable indulgence with a behavior that provides delayed rewards, increasing the likelihood that change will stick. In a research study, participants who received an audio book with encouragement to temptation bundle, boosted the likelihood that they would work out.
Create a reward mechanism. If there is something waiting for you once you’ve reached your goal you’ll be more motivated to keep going. Identify a meaningful reward that will help you keep moving towards your goal instead of giving up.
Three questions for you:
Where in your life do you want to create change?
What is it costing you to not change?
What tiny habit could you start today that could move you towards the change you desire?
What I’m Reading
How to Change - The Science of Getting from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be by Katy Milkman - This book is practical, easy to read and packed full of research.
Tiny Habits - The Small Changes That Change Everything by BJ Fogg - BJ has a simple methodology to create meaningful change that actually works. He has a free 5-day program you can join here.
Quote I’m Pondering:
“A year from now, you will wish you had started today.”
— Karen Lamb